A letter to my relocating self

A letter to my Relocating Self.

Being a Relocating spouse is like being on a roller-coaster. The highs are wonderful, while the lows are lonely. To navigate this, I used to journal a lot. In one of my journals, I decided to write a letter to myself. The “me” who was just about to relocate. After all, who better than myself to give me advice?

I decided to write about all the things I wish I knew. In a way this letter can be to my past self, or my future self. After all, who knows, I may relocate again! So here goes:

Dear Aditi aka my relocating self ;

So, you are relocating again! I know this seems hard. The process for taking this decision has not been easy. Yet, here you are.. This is not the first time you are relocating. This may not be the last. That’s what makes it tough. 

So, what do I want to tell you? It’s not so much about telling you, as much as it is about reminding you. Because you already know all this. You sometimes forget this. So as your future self, I am here to remind you. I know you like lists. So, here you go; 

#1: Do not worry about your career: Or worry, but know that worry is not going to do anything. Your journey to finding your life purpose, career, achieving financial goals  will continue irrespective of your moves. Yes, these might be detours. They will take you on roads that you never intended or wanted to take. Yet these are the roads that you need to walk on. Some day it will all make sense. The dots will connect. They always do. Your career is a marathon, not a 100 m sprint. 

#2 You have nothing to prove: I know you. The desire to prove yourself to the world is within you. It is the fire that burns within. But , think of how far you have come. Think of how far you are going to go. Time spent proving something to someone including yourself is time spent away from your path. You are enough. As you are. You are marvelous.

#3 It is going to be hard, but go with the flow:You know this already. But no matter what you expect or are prepared for, it will be tougher than you expect. It will be different. Things will take longer than expected. Difficulties may crop up. There may be curve balls. There will also be infinite possibilities that will make choosing hard. No matter how much you prepare for it, you will not be prepared. So why, not enjoy the journey, and go with the flow?  

#4 Dont’ rush into anything:Whether it is a job,  a project , friendships, dont rush into anything yet. When you are relcoating, it is a vulnerable time. Take the time to decide who are the people who you will be vulnerable with. 

# 5 Be gentle with yourself : Refer to # 3. When things are tough, dont make them about you. Know that you have done everything you could and more. But stuff happens. Learn from it and move on. You will make mistakes. So does everyone.,

# 6: Be ok with doing nothing: Take this opportunity as a time to “do nothing” and just “be”. “Being” gives you the time, space and clarity to move through all the change. 

# 7 Tell yourself, It is all going to be ok:In moments of ambiguity, tell yourself that. Say it a 100 times each day. It truly is. After all, I am from the future. So I know it is. 

#8 Enjoy every moment: You already know this. The high of discovering a new place. The romantic notions of starting over. The clean slate of a fresh start. Not everyone gets this chance. In a sense, relocating gives you a reset in many areas of your life. Take advantage of it, and make the most. 

# 9 Make a wall of Joy: I wish I had known about this sooner. So I am telling you. As you relocate, and find everything unfamiliar including your new home, make a wall of Joy. It does not have to be something fancy. Pick a wall, and tape stuff on it. Posters, photos, whatever gives you joy.

#10 Last and not the least: Do your own thing. Be you. Don’t take advice from anyone including me. Be you, because you are marvelous.

Yours truly,

Me aka You aka We

I hope I am able to read this letter, if and when I relocate again. There is so much wisdom that each of us have, and we forget it sometimes. Who better than you yourself to give “you” the best advice. 

If you were to write a letter to your relocating self, what would you say?

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